Hair Today, Gone tomorrow

This is a very hard post to write because it's a subject people just don't like to talk about, however it's quite important to me. It's been noticed on my YouTube videos that I have thinning hair. Well it's true, my hair is very thin, it sometimes makes me very unhappy and frustrated but I have to come to terms with it and get on with my life. This post is for anyone also struggling to meet expectations that other people have of us.

I've been losing my hair since I was 18. I was diagnosed with a not very rare disease in my early twenties. Hypothyroidism is where your body produces too little of a metabolic hormone which gradually makes you anaemic and exhausted. The opposite condition is Hyperthyroidism where too much of this hormone (thyroxine) makes your heart race and eyes bulge and lose weight dangerously quickly. Your thyroid and pituitary glands are parts of this regulatory circuit, for reasons medical science can't explain or cure, mine don't really work that well.

After feeling sluggish and unwell for years, I finally went to my doctor and had blood tests to confirm it. That was ten years ago so I am lucky, I was diagnosed early. My mother was in her 50s when she was diagnosed. We both now take medication which has no side effects and controls it completely.

Part of this disease, which not everyone has, is that my immune system makes antibodies which attack hair follicles. So my hair falls out faster than it grows. No one knows why some people get this and others don't, my mother doesn't have it. There is no treatment for this that doesn't involve immunosuppressants (which would leave me open to life threatening infections, that isn't worth it!) For others, the thyroxine hormone treatment restores their hair. This hasn't happened for me which is unfortunate.

According to specialists, I will never go bald as my hair grows normally. But my hair will always be thin and patchy. As time goes on, it gets worse. I think the time will come soon when I have to do something. Part of me just feels like shaving my hair off now rather than make the decision later on!

It's not easy for anyone who has lost their hair, through illness, accident or genetics. I used to model as a teenager, my hair was so thick that it used to break bands and the odd brush handle! I once had my hair done on stage and most of it had to be done behind the scenes as it took so long! So it's been very hard for me to come to terms with this condition.

It's ok for men to lose their hair, it is part of their ageing process. For women it is very different, our hair is part of our femininity and because it's quite rare to see a bald woman, we are made to feel inferior, less feminine and a failure.

I'd like to know what people leaving comments hope to achieve by pointing it out as if I don't know?

YouTube Comment:"You are nearly bald"

Answer "And what would you like me to do about this that I haven't already tried? Hmm?"

This person was so disgusted with the realisation that I was far from perfect, that they unsubscribed to my YouTube channel! That made me feel just great.

I wonder if they want me to scurry under a rock never to be seen again just because it offends them that this balding woman is called a beauty guru? I must also stress that I don't want pity, just understanding, after all it's only hair.

All I ask is that before leaving mean comments FOR ANYONE, put yourselves in their position. They are just as human as you are and just as easy to upset and hurt. I am older and wiser and it takes a lot to rile me. Some YouTubers are teenagers and so take comments to heart. If you still feel the need to type before you think, go ahead, I have nothing to be ashamed of and I will not be made to feel inadequate for something I can do nothing about.

A bit more info on hypothyroidism from this UK Website