For those of you who don't know Mewser, she was quite old - we are not sure how old as I got her from a rescue centre. We think she was probably about 15 years old. I've had her for seven years. When she came to me she was so skinny, terrified and obviously had been abused. It took six months to earn her trust and she eventually blossomed in to the most affectionate and loyal friend.
Last year Mewser developed kidney disease, a common terminal disease in older cats with no treatment or cure. She also suffered a stroke earlier this year which left her legs weak and she was also blinded. Since then her life had gone downhill, every day was difficult for her. But she would still purr and loved our company. We were not ready to say goodbye.
This week when the vet said that we had to do something, there was no do nothing option, we decided that she had been brave enough and it was time to let her go to peace. It was one of the most distressing things I have ever had to do, it all happened so quickly that one moment she was there and the next she was gone forever.
What was good was that we bought her body home with us, I was able to talk to her and say goodbye. I asked for her forgiveness and understanding that we loved her so much that we had to put her welfare ahead of our feelings of loss.
It's hard when you lose someone close to you, the added guilt that I had made the decision to end her life weighs heavily on me. I don't feel like much of a cat momma for doing it. In time I know that I will feel that I did the responsible thing. Her life had degenerated so much that it was not fair to keep her alive just so I could have her presence in my life. I had always known that I would have to make this decision if she did not die naturally. I had hoped against hope that she would slip peacefully away in her sleep.
The little black furry void which has been left in my life is hard to bear at the moment, I keep thinking I hear her stirring behind me or calling me from the kitchen to feed her. I try not to think of her last moments in the vets but more of her happy moments and the love that we shared.
I am very glad that I made these videos about Mewser, you can see all her antics here. http://www.youtube.com/user/TheMewser
I'm sure you did the right thing, no matter how much it hurts. You gave her a good home and that is a good thing. I love Mewser's youtube :)xx
ReplyDeleteI have lost cats both ways and although it hurts more than anything - bringing them home and putting them through more and more treatment was the worst thing ever, just watching them get weaker in front of you was the most awful thing to see. You made the right choice my love, you proved how much you loved Mewser by refusing to see her in more pain - she'll forgive you quite simply because there was nothing to forgive xx Take care and remember the happy times xx
ReplyDeleteYou did the right thing Jasmine :) like you said, she had been brave for a long time, so it was time for her to rest. I'm sure she understands this and I bet she's grateful for you taking this decision :)
ReplyDeleteYou certainly did the right thing, sounds like you gave her the best life she could ever have wished for. I lost a cat to lung cancer and it's like loosing a family member or a best friend.
ReplyDeleteWe are not just mothers, we are caretakers of our kitties and puppies. What you did was end her suffering. It was a generous thing to do. To keep her alive would have meant suffering for her to be there for you. Instead, you let her go so she could escape the pain of dying slowly.
ReplyDeleteI hope you feel better soon, but I know it's hard. You did the right thing!
I am so sorry to hear! My hamster's body made the decision of when he was to die before I could, which I am grateful for, he went laying on my chest all wrapped up, just me and him, it was really peaceful which I was glad at, but all the same - heartbreaking.
ReplyDeleteYou can tell that Mewser loved being your cat and you gave her a brilliant life x
As I told you, you don't have to feel guilty to have chosen to let your little furry heart go. She had a wonderful life with you and you have been her best friend til the end, loving and taking care of her everyday. You've been a very good catmomma for Mewser. I loved her through your videos and will keep her little silhouette in mind. I hope you'll feel better soon and send you all my thoughts. xx
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness how difficult for you - I am all teary just reading this. You def did the right thing, your beloved pet always trusts you to do the right thing for them. I have 3 cats and 2 dogs and dread the day I am faced with a decision like this... Take care of yourself and remember her fondly xx
ReplyDeleteMy heart goes out to you.. I hope the two of you will feel a bit better soon.
ReplyDeleteIt is a weird thing, death, loved ones leaving us because they have to, pets going through their whole life and getting old so much faster than us.. :/
Virtual hugs to you xx
I'm so sorry for your loss Jasmine. She couldn't of asked for a better mummy! A very lucky lady to be rescued by you and your husband. You have done the right thing. She can be at peace now. X x
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss!
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is incredibly difficult. I've gone through it twice and it's so heartbreaking. But it sounds like you have many happy memories. The pain will lessen eventually and you will be able to remember the happy times.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure Mewser would thank you for the last kind thing you could do. I know how heartbreaking it is-my family have had to have several cats and dogs put to sleep over the years when it would have been unkind to make them stay with us any longer. She'll be at peace now x
ReplyDeleteAwww so sorry for your loss Jasmine. I know it's no consolation now, but it sounds like did the right thing for Mewser. x
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry Jasmine. Mewser sounded like the most wonderful, wonderful cat. We have two rescue cats who have bloomed but are still jittery after four years, so you must have given her so much love for her to become the cat she was always meant to me. That makes you the best cat momma possible. Sending you massive hugs and all my sympathy x
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for your loss, my mum's a vet so we have lots of pets and consequently have lost a lot in my lifetime! It never gets easier, especially when they are like a close friend. The best thing is to be grateful for the happy memories, and know that you did the right thing at the right time, I'm sure she would prefer to be at rest rather than having to deal with the added distress of recovering from an op. You did the right thing <3 xxx
ReplyDeleteOh no! I know this sounds silly but I actually cried when I watched that video you made of Mewser after her stroke a little while back. I am not an animal person but at the risk of sounding so silly I really felt an "aura" about her. x
ReplyDeleteAm very sorry for your loss jasmine but I believe you helped your dear mewser. It is very tough to take such a decision but then it does become necessary to prevent the suffering of loved ones.I had to do the same for my dog sometime ago and I never brought home another one but to be honest ,I still feel sad for my dog, it was my best friend .
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss. I definately think you made the right decision, it's better to have her slip away nice and painlessly then put her through a situation which would at best be stressful and at worse very painful. 2 cats we owned since I was a tiny kid had to be put to sleep recently. I miss them dreadfully but it was what was best for them. I hope you feel better soon.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to read about Mewser, I can really feel the pain in your words, you surely did the right thing but I understand really well how hard it is to learn to let go and decide to do what's best for our furry companions. My beautiful cat Sunday is old and has some health problems which might escalate we don't know when, I really dread that moment so much; I am sorry about what you've had to go through so I really want to send you a big hug. I'm sure Mewser knows you did it for her and she was so loved that your love is with her forever while she is running happy on the Rainbow Bridge (if you haven't heard of the Rainbow Bridge please read here http://rainbowsbridge.com/poem.htm) a BIG hug from Italy
ReplyDeleteOh Honey, I'm so so so so so sorry. I'm sending you loads and loads of love from Precious, Pouncer and I. I hate to think of what I'll be like when I'm in that situation with the P's. I was "lucky" and had moved to the UK when my parents had to do the same with my Aussie kitty. They still cry years later. It's not an easy thing to do but in my heart I know you'd feel even worse if you had to watch your darling suffer even more on a daily basis. Big cuddles and you know where I am if you need anything at all. R xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comments, they are appreciated very much xx
ReplyDeleteDear Jasmine,
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry you had to make this difficult decision. I had to do the same with my cat Tosca 18 months ago - she had end stage renal failure which was only diagnosed about 6 weeks before we had to say goodbye. Reading your post has made me blub out loud, it's very difficult for others to understand how we feel about our furry babies. 4 kg of purr leaves a big hole in your life... I hope that you are feeling stronger and feel confident that the decision you made, although difficult for you was the best outcome for Mewser. Try to remember all the good times she shared with you and it will get better.